From the mouths of babes <3

My writing buddy, Shelly Templin, sent me a link to a t-shirt a while back. She had ordered one and knew I needed it as well. I placed my order directly upon receiving. 

The wording on the shirt says, “I am a writer. Anything you say or do may be used in a story.”

It is not only humorous, it is the absolute truth. 

It’s not that we mean to eavesdrop or spy or invade your space. 

For writers, the people and conversations, situations and circumstances around us often capture our attention and we start putting words to it as naturally as one snaps a photo of a pretty flower or a lovely sunset. 

Thus, as I sit in the lounge area waiting for Caroline during her dance class, I am privy to all kinds of material. 

Some can be told, some cannot. 

I think this one is safe. 

The past two weeks, a young girl who appears to be about eleven to twelve years old has created a fair amount of drama as she scrolls through text conversations on her phone and tells her classmates who are waiting for their session all about a girl at school who is bothering her. 

I do not have to lean in to listen. She is quite loud and expressive. Apparently the girl she is dealing with is a mean girl and has been doing what mean girls do. Excluding our complainant from activities and yet baiting her with questions of what is wrong with their friendship. 

Last week she went through the entire scenario numerous times with a variety of listeners. If they tried to speak, she just talked over them. Often they would listen for a bit and then move away. 

This week, all was quiet when I arrived. There were a few students getting their shoes on and putting hair up, some were chatting quietly. As I settled into my seat and pulled my knitting out, this young lady entered the area and the atmosphere changed. 

Apparently the week has brought more conflict with her antagonist. She plopped down on a bench next to one of her classmates, pulled out her phone and began this week’s edition of the saga. 

From time to time I would glance up to observe the one who sat quietly on the end of the bench, trapped and listening. I watched her facials as she would politely nod from time to time. She would look down at her hands a bit, straighten her tights, look up at the ceiling and then another gentle nod.

A few times she tried to interject about an experience she had had with a girl who was not nice, but she was ignored as her seat mate continued to expound and scroll. Other girls in the proximity disengaged and moved to other areas of the room or to an adjacent waiting area. 

I was intrigued by the quiet one. 

At one point the story teller provided proof of a great comeback she had given in one of the text threads. The quiet one finally spoke firmly an admonishment that it was not a good idea to take that route. 

This interjection caused the speaker to have to pause. Obviously this was not part of her script and she had no response. 

The pause gave the quiet one a space to tell her story of a similar incident the year before. She had had a friend and they parted ways. It was hard but she knew she had done nothing wrong so she gave the girl space and made other friends. 

This year, they have reconnected and are friends again. 

The girl with the phone shook her head in disbelief and then asked, “Did you ever ask her what happened?” 

The quiet one just shook her head no and said it doesn’t really matter. People get upset about things and sometimes you just need time and separation. 

The scrolling and the storytelling ended and there was room for all the girls to talk about the upcoming recital and school and whatever was on the minds of each of them.

It took everything within me to not get up and approach these two young women. 

I wanted to tell the quiet one that I hope she always has the ability to be still and give things time. I wanted to tell her that I saw how she had just listened and waited until she had a place to speak and make a difference. 

I hope she knows what a gift that kind of wisdom is to the more emotionally reactive women in her life. 

And I wanted to tell the girl with the phone to put away the phone and truly appreciate the gift of this class mate in her life. I wanted to tell her to spend her time looking for friends like this one and not waste any more time on anything less. 

But I didn’t. 

I just made a note in my head to tell you all about what I observed and to remind myself who I would like to model and then pray for God to develop in me a quiet spirit that forgives quickly, doesn’t carry tales and listens when others speak <3