Christmas Countdown 2023… Day 20
Subbing in the elementary schools was something I continued to do for a number of years as our children got older. As long as I was standing in front of a class, I decided to answer an ad for a part time GED tutor at the local community college. My task was to help prepare adults of all ages who had not received their high school diploma with some extra math and English course work.
I was armed with files of worksheets and high hopes for inspiring my students. Ready to cheer them on and equip the people who showed up, I was somewhat disappointed when the enthusiasm was not even remotely matched by the few young people who drifted through the period I was assigned.
It was up to the students to make the effort to come to these tutoring sessions and there was not much follow through. I did have two students that stand out in my memory. Whether it was because they came with more consistency or just the circumstances around their story I am not sure, but I remember both vividly.
One of them was a man not that much younger than me. He had been in a very bad accident and had lost his short term memory. He had already received his diploma from both high school and college, but the accident had damaged parts of his brain and he was enrolled in this tutoring to help develop some recall skills. The idea was that as he was reintroduced to materials he had once mastered, he would be able to retain more.
He was a bit of a jokester and had no trouble remembering how to get in jabs to tease me. While he would tell me the same stories every single time and forget some major details of some important information, he was a whiz at math and asked if he could grade other people’s papers. I figured that was beneficial to him for the purpose he was taking the class, so I let him do that. He figured he was doing my job for me and had the right to tease me even more.
He was a character for sure. Several years later when our son got a part time job at a store near our home, he informed us that one of his new coworkers had been my student. Sure enough this guy, with the short term memory loss problem had landed a job and was working with our son. And yes, razzing him about me all the time as he still claimed that he did my job for me.
I guess for that I can feel I accomplished something in my time there. At least one of my students succeeded in getting a job and apparently his memory improved enough to remember me, the class, his ever running joke and the ability to connect my last name with our son. For better or worse (for me), I helped him, and it sure made for a laugh around our house.
The other fellow I remember was so young. He was working a construction job and wanted to get his high school diploma so he could make better money. As badly as he wanted to improve his lot, he also seemed to struggle with keeping late hours. I assume from the way he came in to class his after work activity involved visiting bars.
Suffice to say his appearance and aroma told his story. Often as I would explain the worksheets for that session, he would listen with his head on his hand. In short order, he would be asleep and this went on more sessions than not. I wanted so badly for him to make a turn and do well, but eventually he just stopped coming.
Over the years I have thought of that one young man and prayed for him. I pray he found his way and reached the place where he was able to complete his GED. I hope he figured out how to stay on track and not waste any more of his life on things that left him empty.
This job made me feel helpless and opened my eyes to the way life can become very difficult with no quick or easy fixes. I think of people close to me who deal with this sense of helplessness in teaching or the medical field every day. May the Lord strengthen those who face apathy, avoidance or self-harming choices in their students and patients on a daily basis as you fulfill your calling.
Every job I have held has taught me things and helped me grow. This one feels like a failure, but it did teach me compassion for teachers and people in health care who face this kind of discouragement.
I only tutored for one semester. The irregularity and lack of commitment with the students plus no real grasp of what I could do to improve the situation led me to believe I was not the right person for this position. I know I was there for reason
Maybe it was just to help that one guy who would eventually work with our son. Maybe it was just to be one more positive voice for a young man who still had a bit of a struggle ahead. Maybe it was just to refine me and remind me I am powerless to change others, but I can be part of the process that can help them when they are ready to change. The experience humbled me and it had an impact on me that produced a softer heart. So for that, I am grateful.