Learning some people skills from a bad example <3
As I continue through the Old Testament for the annual read through, I am currently in the accounts of Saul and David. This is a section rich in information and every time I read it, I pick up something new.
However; my thoughts today are a repeat of the same question that has popped up every time I read the roller coaster relationship these two men shared. Since I am using the Chronological Bible, I am assured that the order of the beginning of their history together began with Saul being tormented by mental issues.
I would assume he had depression along with some serious emotional struggles. Someone on his staff suggested music therapy as a solution and recommended a young shepherd nearby who happened to also be a talented harpist. David is brought to the palace and brings comfort to Saul.
In 1 Samuel 16:21-22 it says Saul “loved David very much,” and that David becomes his armor bearer. Saul sends word to Jesse that he is going to keep David in his service. From there we learn that there are more instances when Saul’s mind is troubled and he sends for David to play.
Following this passage there seems to come along a time of war. While the Philistines are amassing armies against the Israelites, it appears David is once again shepherding his father’s flocks. David’s older brothers are in Saul’s army and Jesse sends food to them via their youngest brother.
Here we find David entering the camp and learning about the taunts of the giant Goliath. David is shocked that anyone would be so defiant against God and is equally surprised that not one soldier is wiling to face this bully. In this familiar story we know David takes a sling and some stones and kills the giant.
But here is the part that stumps me. Afterwards, Saul asks Abner, the commander of his army to go find out who the kid is.
What?
How does Saul not know who David is?
He had told his dad he was keeping him as his armor bearer a few short verses earlier. He loved him. Loved his music. Called for him when he needed comfort. Yet, no recollection of him as he stands before him to offer to fight the Philistine.
Can the Bible be mixed up on facts? I don’t think so.
I think maybe it is human nature and hubris at play.
Maybe King Saul got relief from a young kid who lived down the street at one of his subject’s ranch. He gave him a bit job in the palace to keep him around for when he needed him. When things got serious and the Philistines declared war, Saul gathered his real armor bearer and his army and headed off.
David returned to his father and was sent out to watch the sheep again. By the time he showed up to check on his brothers, Saul had totally forgotten him. Or never really cared who he was but just what he could do for him.
It makes me think of the times I served as extra help in the Executive dining room at ADM. As I worked two mornings a week on the Sensory Panel for a few years, we were sometimes offered extra hours helping with food prep for the special dining room where the higher echelon ate lunch or had meetings.
Sometimes various officers and such in the company would come in to make requests for snacks and drinks to be brought to a conference room. A lot of times I knew these guys personally. They worked with my husband and/or I went to church with them.
But they didn’t recognize me in my white lab coat working alongside the other ladies who were there every day. Oh, they were courteous and smiled and said hi, but when I called them by name as I returned the greeting, the surprise was evident. They were super friendly when they realized it was me, but still.
It made me realize how we can be cordial to the person taking our order in the restaurant and yet have no idea who they are. After a couple of times of having this happen to me, I wondered how many times I had politely given my order to a young person who I might actually have known if I had really looked into the face and registered them in my mind.
Since then I make an effort to actually look at the face of the person who walks up to our table and says, “Hi. I am ______ and I will be taking care of you today.”
Russ and I typically use the name as we visit with them and when they ask us how we are, we ask how their day is going, too. You can tell from the response that this is not the norm. Often after they answer, the server will thank us for asking.
The people who ring up your groceries, take your order, clear your table or hand food out of the drive up window are people who deserve being looked in the eye and thanked sincerely. And you might be surprised to occasionally recognize a familiar face on the other side of that transaction.
It’s worth taking a good look.
Blessings friends <3